What to Wear to a Bridal Shower

A friend's bridal shower last spring. Twelve women. Three showed up in nearly identical blush floral dresses. Two wore cream—close enough to white that the bride's mom kept glancing at them. And one came in athleisure because she'd somehow gotten the impression it was a casual backyard thing.

The photos went up. The group chat went quiet. At least two people I know deleted their posts by evening.

Here's the thing about bridal shower dressing: it sits in this awkward middle ground. More intentional than brunch, less formal than the rehearsal dinner. You're supposed to look like you tried, but not like you tried too hard. It's a weirdly specific vibe to nail.

After fifteen years of writing about what to wear to things—and getting it wrong myself more times than I'd like to admit—here's what I actually tell friends when they text me in a panic.

The white thing is obvious. The almost-white thing is not.

Everyone knows not to wear white. But champagne? Cream? That pale blush that photographs basically ivory in afternoon sun? These trip people up constantly.

My rule: if you're standing in front of your mirror wondering "is this too close to white?"—it probably is. Just pick something else. It's not worth the mental energy of second-guessing yourself all day, and definitely not worth the awkwardness if the bride notices.

Colors that work beautifully for these things: sage, dusty blue, lavender, terracotta, soft coral, mauve. They photograph well, they're celebratory without being loud, and they won't compete with whoever's wearing white.

On the flip side, head-to-toe black can read a bit funereal unless it's an evening cocktail situation. A black dress with colorful accessories? Fine. All black with black shoes at a 2pm garden party? Maybe reconsider.

Midi length is your friend

Somewhere between knee and ankle. It works for almost every venue, almost every body type, and eliminates the whole "can I sit down in this" question.

I've watched women in short dresses spend entire parties tugging at their hems, perching on the edge of seats, trying to figure out how to play shower games without flashing everyone. That's not fun. That's logistics management disguised as a party.

Midi skirts move nicely, they look polished without being stiff, and they let you actually relax.

Fabric matters more than you think

Anything with drape—silk, soft cotton, flowy chiffon—tends to work better than structured pieces. You're going to sit on couches, hug people, maybe play some slightly undignified games involving toilet paper wedding dresses. Stiff fabrics fight you. Soft ones move with you.

Also worth considering: wrinkle factor. I own this beautiful linen dress that looks incredible for exactly forty-five minutes. After that, it looks like I slept in it. Not ideal for a three-hour party with photo opportunities.

On prints

Florals are classic for a reason, but there's a range. Giant tropical blooms make a statement—sometimes too much of one. Tiny ditsy prints can read a little precious. Something in the middle, with a mix of colors that aren't all fighting for attention, tends to photograph best in group shots.

Solid colors are underrated. A well-cut solid dress in a good color can actually stand out more than the fifth floral in the room. Less noise, more impact.

Read the room (or at least the invitation)

A shower at someone's house calls for something different than a shower at a rooftop restaurant. Garden party vibes are different from afternoon tea vibes.

When in doubt, just ask. Text the host or the bride's sister or whoever's organizing and say "what's the vibe?" Nobody thinks this is weird. Everyone thinks it's considerate.

If you absolutely can't get intel, err slightly more dressy than you think necessary. Showing up a touch overdressed reads as "I really wanted to celebrate you." Showing up underdressed reads as... well, you know.

Keep accessories simple

This isn't the occasion for your statement necklace collection. Pick one thing—earrings you love, a delicate bracelet, an interesting ring. Let that be your thing.

Small bag. You'll be moving around, maybe helping out, definitely taking pictures. A clutch or small crossbody keeps your hands free.

Shoes: consider the actual venue. Stilettos on grass is a particular kind of misery. Block heels, wedges, or nice flats are almost always the smarter call.

The real test

Before you leave the house, sit down in your outfit. Bend over. Raise your arms. Walk around a bit.

Can you eat a piece of cake without worrying about your neckline? Can you sit on a low couch without tugging at your hem? Can you give someone a real hug without your dress riding up?

If yes, you're good. If you're already mentally managing your outfit, pick something else.

The best thing you can wear to a bridal shower is something that lets you forget what you're wearing. Something that lets you be fully present—laughing too loud at the terrible jokes, actually enjoying the games, being in the photos instead of hiding from them.

That's the whole point, really. You're there to celebrate someone you love. Your clothes should make that easier, not harder.